As I’ve said before, butter is much healthier for you than processed vegetable oil spreads made with polyunsaturated fats (PUFAs) like canola and soybean oil. Many spreads also contain trans fat (hydrogenated or partially hydrogenated oil), but claim they do not contain trans fat. Trans fats are not found in nature and are so bad for your heart that they have been banned from New York City restaurants. You should eat zero grams of it. Take a look at Benecol. They claim it’s heart healthy because it contains plant sterols, but it’s loaded with trans fats.

Ingredients

Liquid canola oil, water, partially hydrogenated soybean oil, plant stanol esters, salt, emulsifiers (vegetable monoglycerides and diglycerides, soy lecithin), hydrogenated soybean oil, potassium sorbate, citric acid, and calcium disodium EDTA for

Preserve freshness, artificial flavor, DL-alpha-tocopheryl acetate, vitamin A palmitate, colored with beta-carotene.

Note that the third ingredient is partially hydrogenated soybean oil. Ingredient seven is hydrogenated soybean oil. How can a product have these harmful trans fats and claim to be free? Well, there is a little trick you see. The FDA allows you to have up to 500mg of trans fat per serving and still claim your product is trans fat free. So, if your serving size contains 100 percent trans fat, but only has 499 mg per serving, you can claim none! Thanks FDA, said the food company, now we can really fool the public eye!

The fats in vegetable oil spreads are not only bad for you, but the manufacturing process is downright terrifying. This is how their “heart healthy” vegetable pasta is made. I thought I’d print it from the maker’s perspective to entertain myself a bit.

Step 1

Extract the oil

Get some soybean, canola, or other genetically modified oil of your choice. Soak in hexane to separate the oil from the seed. Yes, it’s toxic to humans and there will be hexane residue left in the final product, but heck, who’s going to know anyway?

Step 2

Remove the hexane from the oil.

We will do this by exposing the oil to high temperature steam. Yes, we know that high temperatures make oils unstable and more susceptible to oxidation (rancidity). Could this increase the risk of heart disease? Possibly, but that’s okay since we’re putting a heart health label on this product. This is what we will do. Add the chemical EDTA to the final product. That should take care of any additional rancidity we’ve already caused.

Step 3

Our oil still has pigments and waxes. We have to get rid of these. Let’s add some sodium hydroxide and sodium carbonate and they will settle to the bottom. Problem solved.

Step 4

This oil has an unpleasant color that the public will not like. How about we add some whitening clays. That should take care of things. It will also remove some antioxidants that prevent rancidity, but we already added some rancidity in Step 2. What’s going to hurt a little more?

step 5

Okay, now it smells bad. We can fix that very easily by subjecting our unstable oil to more heat. We’re going to expose it to 500 degrees Fahrenheit steam. That will remove all those volatile compounds that create that smell. Yes, it will make our oil oxidize more, but we have the heart-healthy stamp, remember? Trust me, they will never know. Heck, we’ve got them so scared of butter and cholesterol that they probably wouldn’t care anyway.

step 6

Our oil is finally ready! Quite complicated, but we managed it. Now we need to convert it to a solid. Let’s hydrogenate it! I know that’s not heart healthy, but remember we can legally tell the public that there is no trans fat. Hey, let’s also stamp zero grams of trans fat on the label! Now let’s add some synthetic vitamin A to make it look like butter and artificial flavor to make it taste like butter and voila! Yippe! Now we have a product with ingredients that the human body has never seen before. Have have to be good for you!

Phew! Are you glad it’s over? I also. I’ll summarize the process of making butter: cream the raw milk and drain off the buttermilk. Continue the rotation. You already have butter! No chemicals, preservatives, artificial flavors, trans fats, or toxic residues. Yes, it has saturated fat and cholesterol, both of which are vital for optimal health. More on that at a later time. If you want healthy cholesterol levels, cut out processed carbohydrates, sugar, breads, pastas, and vegetable oils. Replace your synthetic Frankenbutter with real butter and get your butt off the couch and working out. That’s the best way to stay healthy my friends!