I must admit I don’t get away with it much, and never have. Not that I never tried. It’s just that every time I try to get my way, it always backfires.

I wish there was a class somewhere called “How You Can Get Away With It”. I would definitely sign up. But I haven’t found it yet.

Every time I do something behind the Graceful Parish Teacher’s back, she always turns around. I don’t know if she has eyes in the back of her head or if she’s just a woman’s intuition. Believe me, I will not investigate this topic.

The many times he has cheated on me is beyond reckoning. I’m probably the easiest person to fool in the entire world. A salesman, I am not.

When I was a kid, I made little saucers out of popsicle sticks. Then I went around the neighborhood to try to sell them. My sales pitch was, “You don’t want to buy one of these, do you?”

I didn’t sell any.

I complained to my mother and she said, “You have to try again. Maybe this time it will work.”

The next day I assembled my material and went from door to door in the neighborhood. To my surprise, everyone bought one of my plates.

I went home very excited and told my mother how many I sold. Over the next few days, I worked to produce these little bowls of popsicles. While working on them, he whistled and sometimes sang.

Years later, I discovered the true story. Remember, Paul Harvey, who used to say, “Now, the rest of the story.”

Behind my back, my mother called everyone on our street to explain the situation and asked them to buy one of my bowls of ice cream. I don’t know for sure, but she may have paid them to do it. I have never been able to find out the truth.

If you can’t fool me, you better hang up your boots and go to bed.

During this “internal season”, the Graceful Mistress of the parsonage put me on a diet. What I am going to do? I am not allowed to enter the kitchen due to the catastrophe that occurred the last time I was in the kitchen. do not ask

He prepared a diet for me that was supposed to be very healthy.

My diet is simply whatever I can get in my mouth at the time. Except, of course, the vegetables. His diet consists of nothing but vegetables.

His idea is that I’m a little overweight. Then I remind you of my favorite Bible verse that says, “all the fat belongs to the Lord” (Leviticus 3:16). When I quote this verse, I always smile and counter it with a smirk that I can’t get over.

She’ll pat my stomach and say, “That’s not what that verse means.”

Never argue with a wife, especially your wife.

All cookies have been eradicated from our facilities. Trust me, I’ve looked everywhere and haven’t found a single cookie crumb.

She made a mistake the other day. As we sat down to watch some TV, she brought out a cookie and said, “Since you’ve been good on her diet, here’s her reward.”

I wish she hadn’t done that. Once I start something, I have an obsession to complete it. And trust me when I say, one cookie doesn’t complete the obsession.

I smiled and thanked him and gracefully chewed the cookie.

That gave me an idea, I had to stop by a little store the next day, and they were selling cookies. I thought to myself, “Well, what will another cookie do to hurt me?”

I only bought a bag of cookies; That’s how disciplined I am. I thought a small bag could be easily hidden. At least that’s what I thought.

When I got home, my wife wasn’t there yet, so it gave me time to hide my little cookie obsession. I hid it near my couch so I could access it without her knowing.

I love when a plan comes together.

I forgot about the bag of cookies because the days can be hectic. After dinner we sat in the living room to relax and enjoy some television. Suddenly I realized that I had a small stash of cookies under my chair. The more I thought about it, the more I thought about it.

During a commercial, my wife got up to go to the bathroom, so I thought it would be a good time to steal a cookie. I reached under my chair to grab the bag of cookies, and couldn’t find it. I searched and searched and searched, and it wasn’t there. I started scratching my head and wondering where I put it.

Then my wife came into the room and said, “You weren’t looking for this, were you?”

In her hand was the bag of cookies that I hid under my chair.

With a small smile on my face, I thought of a verse from Scripture: “But if you do not do so, behold, you have sinned against the Lord, and you are sure that your sin will find you out” (Numbers 32:23). .

No matter how hard we try, our sin will eventually catch up with us.